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Ever had one of those days when something totally unexpected happens and it creates a paradigm shift you didn’t know you needed to make?

I am a huge fan of Jerry Mahoney and his blog, Mommy Man. Jerry writes about his adventures, as he puts it, as a gay superdad. On October 23, Jerry was on the Today Show in a segment called The New Normal, talking about how he and his boyfriend, Drew, became a family. I’m thinking that the spot on the Today Show may have caused an increased interest in Jerry’s blog.

And that’s where my fun day begins….yesterday I received a reply to a comment I wrote on Jerry’s blog back in September. That particular day’s post was titled “A Gay Dad Wonders….Do My Kids Deserve a Mom?” and was prompted by comments by celebrities about the lives of children whose parents are gay. (I know, right? Like good parenting is the exclusive domain of heterosexual couples….give me a break….)

My comment to that blog was: “Good lord….there are too many people with too much time on their hands speaking out about stuff (a) they don’t have a clue about and (b) should mind their own business about. If celebrities or anyone has got time to think about other people’s lives and spout off about them, they should get a life. I grew up in a single family home in the 60s and people were constantly proclaiming we were all going to hell in a hand basket. Seriously. Your family has just what it needs: lots of love. And a sense of humor.”

Jerry responded kindly and that was that.

Or so I thought. Until yesterday. I received a reply that said, “Der Paula: you mean like you? too much time and talkin s**t?”

Really? At first I thought, whatever. But then, I thought, no. You want to send it out there, I’m going to respond. Perhaps not the high road, but we’re all entitled to slinging it once in a while.

I responded simply: “Ahhh, let me think for a moment. No. But thanks for exemplifying my comment”. I knew that it would not end there.

Bring it on.

And he did. But I have to say, I laughed out loud when I read it:

“of course like all guilty ridden liberals it couldn’t be you. oh not Paula, she is the supporter, the validator, the nice little understanding and patronizing creep that hides behind pulled curtains and the dead bolted door and tells the kiddies to not look out there. the tolling queen that wants to show her tolerance.and the I’m so witty because i can prove my point. which is? that your a gay lovin patronizing skuank that really wishes they would all move back to San Fran? go back to fruitville NC”

Where do I begin? What the heck is a “skuank” (perhaps a cross between a skank and a skunk)?

You know, there is a fine line between encouraging negative comments and standing up for yourself. Needless to say, I’m not responding to the “skuank” comment. Obviously this person is not worth engaging with.

Paradigm shift: There are people who are not in favour of gay marriage or gay parents and they comment respectively on Jerry’s blog all the time. Those are the opposing viewpoints and people I want to engage with in conversation. Try to find a way to openly discuss our differences in a way that brings people into a dialogue that will hopefully promote change. 

And for the haters (who seriously need to use spell check, just sayin’):

lalalalalalalal I can’t hear you….